Yours furrever
by MasteringtheMachine
Summary: In which Castiel takes on the unlikely role as caretaker for a kitten in order to better understand the odd effects the animal is having on Sam and Dean. Cracky fluff.


"The answer is no, Sam," Castiel snaps, glaring up at the abnormally tall man, who was clutching small, black kitten to his chest. Quite frankly, Castiel found the sight disturbing.

"But _Cas_, look at him," Sam whines, yes, _whines_, pushing the cat into Castiel's face.

Castiel does indeed look, unable to do anything else when the ball of fuzz is being shoved into his face. Castiel's nose twitches as a bit of hair tickles his nostrils and he is sent into a fit of sneezes. The cat begins to purr, obviously taking delight in his pain. Once he has regained control of himself, he fixes Sam with another glare. "No."

"Why not? It'd only be until Dean and I get this case sorted."

"No."

"Please! It won't take longer than a week!"

At this point, Sam's eyes grow large. Castiel can't understand why, but the look on his face brings about an uncomfortable tug in his gut. "Fine."

Actually, the case could end up taking some time. Bastet, an Egyptian cat goddess, has been wrecking havoc by calling out to the towns population of cats. Countless cats have vanished, So the Winchesters had chosen to investigate. When Sam had been out doing research, he'd somehow ended up promising to keep this particular kitten from harm in return for information. Dean hadn't minded, because the woman calling in the favour was hot. Castiel on the other hand...

He wrinkles his nose in disgust as the cat licks his cheek. "That is unhygienic," he informs Sam.

"You can't get sick," Sam scoffs, brushing off his concerns.

The kitten lets out a mewl and leaps from Sam's arms, clinging on to Castiel's tie and, slowly and mercilessly, claws his way up to his shoulder. "I do not trust this animal," he tells Sam gravely.

Sam just laughs. "I'm sure you two will get along nicely."

Once Sam is out of earshot, the kitten seems to notice something behind Castiel's back. Cautiously, the angel turns, and is rewarded by a set of sharp teeth sinking into the base of his left wing.

He glares at the kitten. "Stop that at once. My wings shouldn't even be within the spectrum of your visual perception."

The kitten pauses long enough to give him a stare, before digging back into his wing, this time with claws.

scsc

"Dean, I demand you do something about your brothers irrational behaviour."

Dean starts violently, almost dropping his beer. "Cas_,_ _how many times..._" he takes a deep breath, forcefully calming himself. "What are you talking about?"

Castiel holds up the kitten by the scruff of his neck. "Sam has entrusted me as the ward for this creature."

Dean's face lights up at the sight. "Hey there, little fella. Thought Sam had lost you."

Castiel feels disheartened as Dean starts poking the animals belly. "Cease that behaviour at once," he says, pulling the cat from the other man's reach. "You seem to be suffering from the same mental delusion as your brother is as of present."

"I'm here too you know!" Sam calls cheerfully from the other end of the room, where he is currently sprawled out with a book, _the little book of cats and kittens, _laying flopped against his stomach.

"Yeah, I was wondering about that," Dean says, eyes snapping out from the kitty-induced daze. "I thought that you were more of a dog than a cat person."

Castiel frowns. "Sam is not a cat person, he is a regular human being, save his consumption of–"

"Expression, Cas," Dean sighs.

"Oh." He pauses, looking from one brother to the other. "I do not believe I will be able to convince either of you of the dark evil lurking beneath this animals furry exterior."

Sam lets out an unattractive snort. "You've got that right!"

"He attempted to ingest my wings."

"He was only playing!" Sam defends. "And he has a name, you know. Snowy. Use it."

"It was painful. And that name is illogical. This animals fur is black and does not resemble the colour of snow."

Both the Winchester brothers stop answering him. Castiel wants to fly away, but the kitten, _Snowy_, has now clawed his way up to his head, and he does not wish to bring the animal with him. Previous attempts to remove the animal from his person had resulted in a bleeding ear and he did not wish to repeat that experience, so he let him be.

scsc

"I am not supposed to dislike any of my fathers creations, but I am beginning to think that you are an exception to the rule."

The kitten meets his eyes, before deliberately swiping a glass from the shelf and onto the floor. It shatters into thousands of pieces.

"I hate you," Castiel tells Snowy. Snowy says nothing in return, but curls up into a ball and falls asleep.

"I hope Sam and Dean understand the risks of leaving you in my care," he tells the cat, cautiously backing himself into a corner.

Snowy stares at him, eyes wide as it crouches up into a hunting position, ready to pounce.

"This is your final warning! If you try and get my wings one more time, there will be consequences!"

The kitten lunges. Castiel tries to dodge, but trips and falls over. Snowy ends up chewing his wings. Again.

scsc

"_Meooww!_"

"You brought this upon yourself!"

"Meeoow!"

"Silence, I am trying to do research."

"_Meeeoooooooowww_!"

Castiel slams the book shut and turns to Snowy, who was been locked away in a prison of books. "If I give you food, will you be silent?"

Snowy looks at him with his large, pitiful eyes.

"This does not mean that I have forgiven you," Castiel sighs, lifting a book so that Snowy can break free. Immediately, he leaps at Castiel and uses his tie to climb up to his shoulder. Silently, Castiel curses himself for fooling for the animals tricks, but does not remove him from his shoulder. Five minutes, he tells himself, then he'll make the cat get off.

scsc

"If Sam had not asked be to keep you safe, I would smite you where you are standing!"

Innocent eyes look up from the pile of torn, tan fabric, formerly known as Castiel's trench coat.

"I believe that your body is currently housing Lucifer," he tells the cat. "How else would you know to destroy one of the few material things to which I have any attachment?"

"Meow..."

"Do not feign innocence!"

Snowy just licks Castiel's fingers.

scsc

"I have come to the conclusion that your influence is starting to have an effect on me," Castiel accuses, wagging his finger in front of Snowy. Snowy licks the finger, then starts rubbing his head against it, purring happily. "This is exactly what I am referring to! I am an angel of the lord, one cat should not hold such power over me."

"Just admit that you love him," Sam says, leaning against the door frame.

"No. He is a nuisance and I long for the day which he will leave."

Sam's smile falters. "Actually, that's what I came to talk to you about. The case has been cleared up. Mandy wants Snowy back now."

Castiel furrows his eyebrows in confusion. "What?"

"He has to go back to his real owner." Sam sounds like he is talking to a small child.

"But you informed me it would take a week. It has only been three days."

"_No more than _a week. Everything is sorted now. He needs to go home. I know you got a bit attached to him, so I thought you might want to say goodbye.

"I did not grow attached to him. He is an average cat. All of Gods creations are equal and I do not prefer Snowy over any other creature," Castiel says, voice flat.

Sam looks at him oddly. "If you say so."

Castiel assumes that his vassal is allergic to cats; that is the only logical explanation as to why his eyes feel so watery.

scsc

"Cas, I got you something!" Sam calls from the door.

Castiel does not move from his place on the bed. "Unless it is a document on the cell structure and destruction of _Vanth_, then I do not need it."

"C'mon, just take a look," Sam pleads, doing that _thing _with his voice that makes Castiel's gut clench in a way which he does not understand.

"Fine."

Grinning, Sam comes into the room, holding a box pressed to his chest. It is large, but does not appear to bare anything heavy, and it has holes in the top. Castiel says as much.

"Your box is broken."

"Just open it!"

Castiel accepts the box and opens the lid. He peers inside. Something sharp clutches at his nose and he pulls back, giving room for a white, fluffy head. "A cat?"

Sam shifts a little nervously. "Yeah. You seemed upset about Snowy, so I thought that maybe you'd like the chance to have a kitten of your own."

"I am busy. I do not have time to keep constant surveillance over it."

"Ah, but I've sorted that already! I spoke to Bobby, and he said you can drop him of there whenever you need."

"But I do not understand the point! We will gain no benefit from housing this creature."

"Aw, please Cas?" Sam says. "Just look at him! You even get to name him."

"I don't know..."

"He'll be yours _furrever,_" Sam tempts.

"That joke was not witty nor clever."

"You've got to be _kitten_ me, it was _purlarious_!"

"Sam, stop it."

"Admit it, my jokes are kind of _cat_chy."

"If you do not stop right now, I will inform Dean of the humiliating things which you mentioned when you were talking in your sleep.

"You want me to stop right _meow_?"

Castiel closes his eyes. _Do not smite Sam. If you do, you will regret it later._ "If I keep the kitten, will you be silent?"

Sam beams. "I knew you'd like your present!"

Castiel turns away, lip twitching ever so slightly. Maybe he _is _a little grateful, but he isn't going to let on. He can thank Sam later, when he has schooled his new companion in the art of behaving.

A sharp pain in the tip of his wing brings a swift end to train of thought. Castiel sighs at the kitten. "You are going to be just as bad as Snowy, aren't you?"

The kitten starts purring. Castiel does not have the heart to push it away.

_End._


End file.
